As a young child growin up,you know when you ask mom and dad for certain things the answer is either yes or no...and then you hear from someone else"when you get older,you could do whatever you want"or the reason i always get mad"Wait until you are 18,because then you become an adult".Because of certain actions commited by certain family membersof mine,It seems i may never be treated as an adult....
Just when you think ur movin on up and finally get to have an opinion in the "Real world",u get shot down.I get shot down. Before i got ill i wanted a pet...ilove dogs,i like reptiles like chameleons because i find these animalsvery interesting.i've always had fish and wanted a hamster...something i could actually play with and take outside sometimes...but at the time i was ill,i was'nt allowed to be around any animal because my blood counts were deadly low and overall i was more then vulnerable to any infection so i had to lay low. But now i take everything one day at a time because i'm in remission and doing extremly well ...and i'm very rarelyaround animals until recently...my bro's dog had pups and he was nice enough to make sure he'd keep one for me.....very thoughtful of him..but other then pups,i wanted to hangout with him cus he's really cool and i don't even get to really be around my friends to just chill and i don't be around fam cus' they all live in another state now or overseas and my "bro"is..let's just say walkin distance from me..and i still don't get to see him! the thing is,although i'm in remission,i don't take chances..its not an option lol and i'm NEVER around animals...even @ the clinic i go2 in the city because once or twice a week someone brings a dog for the kids to play with but i keep my distance..iwanna go to my cuzzos house to hang with HIM...the pups are the scene and need a break and to be with their mother...i can't go to my bro's house cus automatically "somebody"thinks i jus wanna be around the puppies..but they will always be there!and in all honsty,i had my chance to be with all of them and hav a little fun but i jus wanna hang with my big bro...shit stinks right now[but when does'nt it?]
anyway,hopefully,things will work out sooner then later and i'll be given a little more freedom..fuckkkkkkkkkkkk i'm bout to be 19!! i jus wanna be able to do me..ON MY OWN and without opinions and "orders"all tha damn time..wut fun is life if i can't live it...
2 comments:
chris thinks you should get a full report on your treatments and what youcan and cannot be around and give it to your parents...i have no idea what its like to be 18 and stuck in the house and can only go out when my parents say its ok....smh.. dont worry your time will come and trust you aint missing out on a lot in this mad mad world....*smooches*
lmao we'll be over in like an hour or so if u guys are'nt busy and i can be around any as long as they aren't sick themselves and i'm in the clear by both parents as of minutes ago lol i;m ool i jus get annoyed wit little things at times
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